Daily Joke: Did you hear about the Mexican train-killer? He had locomotives.

Daily Joke: I bet the butcher forty bucks that he couldn’t reach the meat on the top shelf. He said: ‘No, the steaks are too high.’

Daily Joke: I’m on a whiskey diet – I’ve lost three days already.

Daily Joke: What goes up but doesn’t come back down? Your age.

Daily Joke: What did one elevator yell to the other? ‘I’m falling!’

Daily Joke: Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? Of course. The Empire State building can’t jump.

Daily Joke: Why do birds fly? It’s faster than walking.

Daily Joke: Why do ducks fly south in winter? Because walking takes too long?