Daily Joke: You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s your common sense leaving your body.

Daily Joke: I’m addicted to brake fluid, but I can stop whenever I want.

Daily Joke: How did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the pizza before it was cool.

Daily Joke: This is my step-ladder. I never knew my real ladder.

Daily Joke: What do you call a dog that does magic tricks? A labracadabrador.

Daily Joke: What’s the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted.

Daily Joke: Did you hear about the guy who ran in front of a bus? He got tired.

Daily Joke: Feeling pretty proud of myself – the puzzle I bought said ‘three-to-five years’, but I finished it in 18 months.